I found some of these funny, anyway:

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What do Santa Clause and Michael Jackson have in common?
- They both leave little boys rooms with empty sacks.

What's the differance bettween Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?
- One is white, made out of plastic, and dangerous for kids to play with. The other you use to carry grociriers in.

What was the first thing Michael Jacksons kid said?
- Which one is mommy?

Why was Michael Jackson spotted at K-mart?
- He heard little boys pants where half off.

What's brown and in a baby diaper?
- Michael Jackson's hand.

How do you nueter Michael Jackson?
- Give him a spiked glove and ask him to sing for you.

How do you tell if Michael Jackson has company?
- If there's a big wheel parked outside his house.

Knock Knock. Who's there. Little boy blue. Little boy blue who? Michael Jackson.

What does Michael Jackson have in common with a Big Mac?
-They're both 30 year old meat between 10 year old buns.

What did Elvis say after hearing about Lisa Marie's marriage to Michael?
- Whew, that's a relief, I thought she married a black guy!

How does Michael Jackson pick his nose?
- From a catalog.

Michael Jackson was on a ship with 100 boy scouts when it hit an ice burg and began to sink. The captain said "abandon ship!" Michael replied "What about the boy scouts?" "Fuck the boy scouts" screamed the captain, then Michael looked around egarly and said "Do we have time?"

Michael Jackson's new singing group- The Jackson Five and Under.

Michael Jackson's new back up singers- The New Kids on my Cock

The similarity between Whiskey and Michael Jackson- they both come in small tots.

It was reported the other day that Michael Jackson wants to be one of the first civilians to travel into space. NASA's spokesmen commented that "We're all fine with the idea, only problem is Jackson insists on coming back".

Why are Michael Jackson's pants so small?
- Because they aren't his!

How many times does 12 go into 35?
- Ask Michael Jackson.

How many Michael Jacksons does it take to screw in a light bulb?
- None, he only screws little boys.

Who does Michael Jackson consider as the 'perfect ten'?
- Two 5 year olds.

Why did Michael Jackson have children of his own?
- Because it's to exspensive to rent them.

How did the courts know that Michael Jackson is guilty?
- They did a rectal exam on one of the boys and found the other white glove.

What has 18 balls and 3 pubic hairs?
- Michael Jackson's slumber party.

What's the differance between Michael Jackson and acne?
- Acne won't come on your face until you're about 15.

What's the differance between Casper and Michael Jackson?
- One is pale and scares children, the other is a friendly ghost.

What's the differance between a horse jockey and Michael Jackson?
- A horse jockey can legally mount 3 year olds.

What does Michael Jackson have in common with a priest?
- They're both a pain in the ass to kids